46 Cartons

I just moved into my new condo

Packing is such a laborious task
Picking up your life
all your important things
judging their worth
and keeping or discarding them

So I played judge and jury
on all my belongings
and those lucky enough to live
were lovingly packed away in boxes
and the rest were ruthlessly thrown in the garbage

Once I had all my precious belongings in boxes
I took stock...
46 cartons

My whole life fits in 46 cartons

46 cartons
about 10 square feet
and 10 square feet of the earth
is what I take up

From that perspective
everything I work so hard for
amounts to 46 cartons
it seems like I should have more

You like to think of yourself as important
but when you see the sum of your life fit neatly
into 46 cartons
all of sudden, you're not so important

In a way, when all your shit is packed around you
in neat little boxes
you get very territorial
like a fish guarding her nest
"get away"...
"this is my stuff"
"this 10 square feet of pathetic belongings are MINE"
"this is me.. all of me"
"this is all I have!"

You seem so small
so insignificant
when your whole world is packed into boxes

46 cartons
my life fits into 46 cartons